Four Badly Cracked Ribs and Some Mild Concussion

I do not like going to casualty. Being in A&E always reminds me of either the night Mr. C was slashed and had to hold one of his cheeks onto the bloody mess of his face or the worst time I ended up there after an argument with Anne-Marie. If NHS Direct had not advised me to go, there is no way I would have trundled off to spend an evening surrounded by drunk vagrants, screaming children and those who had clearly sustained injuries whilst out of their heads on too much booze or other substances.

In the end, tonight’s trip to A&E was not too traumatic experience. I was even able to make the waiting aspect bearable by reading the whole of Hour of the Geek despite two hours of constant shouting by a tramp and a barrage of interruptions from an amnesiac named Anthony.

It was also over relatively quickly. I had my chest shaved – given my generous rug this always happens when an ECG is involved – was x-rayed, prodded, poked and sent home as soon as it was established I have four badly cracked ribs and some mild concussion. I now owe the hospital £13.30 for drugs as I had no money on me, but unless I begin to cough blood or pass out through lack of breath, do not need to go back to casualty.