The Hair of Former Spice Girl
As a hardened ex-hack and spin doctor, it takes a lot to stagger me. Not much makes my jaw drop these days. Exposure to the worlds of hardcore journalistic and political cynicism has left my skin armoured with scars through which a spike of surprise can rarely pierce.
However, an effective attack of the staggering can still be mounted against me if it takes the form of an ambush whilst I am feeling at my most relaxed.
Walking home after a Thai meal out with Surreal Girl and the man she lives with, he calmly slipped into the conversation that he had some hair from ‘Baby Spice’ that could go into their lounge’s display cabinet. I could feel myself spluttering as the terrain of sanity disintegrated before me. I searched for words to express my shock and disbelief. Not only had someone sort out and kept part of Emma Bunton’s over-dyed mane, they even contemplated putting it on show rather than hiding away a sordid souvenir that should in fact be a source of shame.
From now on I refuse to feel any guilt over displaying the collection of Doctor Who toys I am building up thanks to the bewildering generosity of some appreciative readers. It may be geekish. It may show an unseemly joy in moulded plastic for an adult, but it at least it is not the hair of former Spice Girl.
However, an effective attack of the staggering can still be mounted against me if it takes the form of an ambush whilst I am feeling at my most relaxed.
Walking home after a Thai meal out with Surreal Girl and the man she lives with, he calmly slipped into the conversation that he had some hair from ‘Baby Spice’ that could go into their lounge’s display cabinet. I could feel myself spluttering as the terrain of sanity disintegrated before me. I searched for words to express my shock and disbelief. Not only had someone sort out and kept part of Emma Bunton’s over-dyed mane, they even contemplated putting it on show rather than hiding away a sordid souvenir that should in fact be a source of shame.
From now on I refuse to feel any guilt over displaying the collection of Doctor Who toys I am building up thanks to the bewildering generosity of some appreciative readers. It may be geekish. It may show an unseemly joy in moulded plastic for an adult, but it at least it is not the hair of former Spice Girl.
posted by David at 11:59 PM
2 Comments:
me thinks there may be some mojo in the spice girl hair, hence the disintegration of sanity. you could use it as both a homeopathic and an atropopaic as well, keep a lock of it in a crystal vial attached to a necklace
OMG, that was funny. Dr. Who toys versus Spice Girl hair.
You should start a wall of shame and start with Spice Girl hair.
My brother's friend has a wall of pain at his work, where they post photographs of real life work accidents where it was painful.
Yes, they carry cameras witih them, or just use their cells, and they do photograph moments of pain that they enjoy thereafter while staring at the wall.
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